Different to the Brochure
by AllTimeNatalie
Summary: So, Larten, Arra, Vancha and Gavner have gone holiday but there's one problem… The cabin is a little different to the one in the brochure. How will things pan out for our favourite vampire and his friends? Four shot. Rating may change.
1. Packing

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing in this story. That covers it about.

**A/N:** Please review and read! Oh well other way round but you get the point. :D Thanks xx

**SUMMARY: **So, Larten, Arra, Vancha and Gavner have gone holiday but there's one problem… The cabin is a little different to the one in the brochure. How will things pan out for our favourite vampire and his friends? Three shot.

**TITLE: **Different to the Brochure

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**Part 1- Packing **

"Larten, I am not sure that this will work." Arra stated, staring down at the pages of a 'First Choice' brochure.

"Why ever do you think that?" He asked, closing the book and placing it on the floor. Arra rolled her eyes and picked it up again.

"Darren picked it." It was true, he had picked the cabin but he had a good taste in holiday destinations since he had been on so many holidays- two every year with his family… well when he still had that family, before he was a vampire. Nodding in agreement, Mr Crepsley looked over at his assistant who was sat in the corner with Evra playing 'Army Nights' with plastic swords. Arra, Gavner and Vancha had travelled all the way from the mountain for this holiday which put even more pressure on him. "Have you seen him? He's playing with a plastic sword shouting 'die you foul beast' at his friend." She grumbled, pointing over at Darren. You see, Arra was very hard to gain respect from and so she picked up on the things which you really wished she wouldn't do.

"You may have a point there. I know Darren and he will not let me down." Mr Crepsley said unconvincingly. Arra raised an eyebrow and smiled.

"Aha, well if you think this will work I will co-operate but when it falls flat on its face do not blame me." Turning and walking out of the tent, he rolled his eyes but smiled at Gavner's expression when he was entering the tent.

"What has her all wound up?" Gavner asked, sitting down and leaning against the wall.

"She has dire feelings about this holiday." Rolling his eyes, Gavner smiled and sighed contentedly. Yesterday he had bought new underwear with elephants and snakes on especially for the holiday. To him, they were his best pair yet and some had monkeys and orang-utans on them which he also adored with a passion.

"Well, that is clearly how Arra acts. Do not worry; she will warm to the idea soon." Gavner grinned, closing the lid on his coffin. He had bought it the other day, it was pretty high tech and had all the latest features – it even had sonar, he had installed in case he got tossed into water or fell of a boat if he was travelling over seas and miraculously got mixed in with some scrap or some bad fish – Arra had her usual wooden one and Vancha? Well Vancha didn't have one. He slept under the stars, he preferred sleeping that way. "Good day Larten." The mumbled sigh seeped out of the coffin followed by a grunt as Gavner got tangled in his I-pod headphones.

"Would you like some assistance?" Mr Crepsley asked, holding the laughter back.

"No thank you." Gavner grunted in return, the lid of the coffin occasionally lifting up from his struggle to untangle himself. "I am free!" A sudden gleeful voice came from the coffin as Mr Crepsley smiled and closed his own, rugged coffin.

"Goodnight Gavner." He replied, closing his eyes and drifting off into dreamful sleep. When morning came and it was the day they went, Mr Crepsley's eyes fluttered open to see a very excited Vancha and Gavner… they had never been on vacation.

"Tonight is the night Larten when we go on holiday! I am so excited." Gavner exclaimed, Arra brushing a comb through her hair and making her way over to him. Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she smiled and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Larten, Gavner found your mobile and he thought that he would test out the camera on you whilst you were sleeping." She giggled, kneeling down on the floor and tightening her arms around his shoulders.

"Now, now just because we are going on holiday does not mean that we get all giddy and lose our manners. Now, I know that Gavner would never do that to me, correct Gavner?" Letting out a slight chuckle, he composed himself and replied.

"Correct." If only Mr Crepsley knew the truth. Opening his suitcase, Gavner smiled when he placed the multi-coloured underwear in followed by the bright pink and blue squid ones and finally, his favourite pair. Looked like he was really getting into the holiday spirit… if only he knew what really lay ahead of them.

"Gavner? Pink and blue squids?" Blushing, he took the second pair off Arra and threw them into the case which was neatly laid on the floor.

"They were a gift." He mumbled, inside knowing it was a complete and utter lie.

"Like the other ones hmm Gavner?" Mr Crepsley asked, holding bursts of laughter in his throat back. "It is okay, we believe you though thousands would not." He smiled, closing his suitcase which he had packed the night before. Both Arra and Vancha had also packed theirs and you guessed it, it was only Gavner who had not yet finished his packing. After two hours of packing, unpacking and packing again, he had finally finished and they hit the road.

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**A/N: **Okay so did you love it? Hate it? Please tell me and I hope you liked it. Next chapter soon hopefully. =] E N J O Y


	2. Journey

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing in this story. That covers it about.

**A/N:** Please review and read! Oh well other way round but you get the point. :D Thanks xx

**SUMMARY: **So, Larten, Arra, Vancha and Gavner have gone holiday but there's one problem… The cabin is a little different to the one in the brochure. How will things pan out for our favourite vampire and his friends? Three shot.

**SORRY NOTE: **Sorry for the wait but I forgot about this one. Chapter three coming soon I hope.

**TITLE: **Different to the Brochure

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**Part 2- Journey **

Five minutes into the journey, Gavner groaned. "Larten, can we go back?" Turning around to face him, Mr Crepsley raised an eyebrow. "I forgot to go to the little vampire's room." Sighing, he rolled his eyes and began to walk back.

"Can you hold on?" He asked, hoping he would say yes.

"No, when you have to go you have to go." Nodding, they proceeded back to the cirque then when he had finished up, they set off again.

"You have put us five minutes behind schedule." Mr Crepsley mumbled, matching Arra's pace and glancing around their bland surroundings. It wasn't a very interesting place and consisted mainly of trees and grass.

"May I just say that I love where the Cirque is situated?" Arra teased, causing Gavner and Vancha to let out sharp and short bursts of chuckling. "Really, it is so interesting." Deciding to walk a little faster, he sped up and soon was almost a mile in front of them. "Larten slow down I was kidding." Arra called though her words were muffled to him.

"No, I like it at this distance I can think clearly." Mr Crepsley stated, turning back around to face the road. "It is much quieter as well. I enjoy the tranquillity." Of course it would be faster if they flitted but they kept to a steady pace instead until the last few miles when they would break into a flit. Running up to him, they all chuckled and giggled.

"Aw Larten, we hate it when you are lonely." Arra smiled, linking arms with him and gazing up at the moon. It was a beautiful night, truly wonderful and that made her teasing seem like a flirtatious aspect.

"Are we nearly there?" Gavner whined, staggering along side Arra and Mr Crepsley. Vancha had taken the lead with a big stick he found in the woods they passed through. He felt like Moses leading the Israelites from Egypt except he was leading three other vampires to a log cabin.

"Patience Gavner, we have been travelling for fifteen minutes, it could take quite while." Again he groaned and huffed, he sounded like a stroppy teenager. "Stick that lip in before the wind comes and sticks it like that." Vancha teased from a short distance in front, causing Gavner to change his facial expression. It was quite saddening that he believed the wind could stick his lip in that particular expression. To his advantage, he was good at acting so disguised it pretty well.

"Larteeeen?" Gavner chanted from behind, seen as he had dropped behind slightly. "How far are we off?"

"About three, four hours," that caused an even louder groan to extract as he quickened his feet and hurried forward.

"When can we flit?" Now was about the time when he began to moan and groan, complaining his feet hurt.

"In about two and a half hours." He nodded and began to walk faster, keeping his voices appearance to a minimum.

"Two and a half hours? What am I an athletic runner? No sir, I shall be flitting in about one hour, my feet are already hurting as it is." Gavner moaned, sighing alongside Arra who was teasing him. "Larten? I'm hungry. Can we stop at a garage or something so I can buy some food." Mr Crepsley stopped and turned to face a rather _weather-beaten looking _Gavner.

"What would you buy? I am forced to believe that they sell pointless, unhealthy food that lack nutrients or vitamins." Gavner shrugged and thought for about five minutes, then nodded and placed a hand on Mr Crepsley's shoulder.

"A KitKat. I could use a KitKat right now or a… Caramak… oh or a packet of Cadbury's buttons." Mr Crepsley mouthed the word 'KitKat?' and looked over at Vancha who was steaming ahead.

"Gavner? What exactly is a KitKat?" His inquiry was found to be very embarrassing and he couldn't help but wonder.

"It is a thin bar of wafer covered in either milk chocolate, orange chocolate or dark chocolate." Vancha stopped so everyone else could catch up and smiled mockingly at Mr Crepsley.

"Word on the street is that you can get mint ones now." Vancha chuckled, Gavner laughing along side with pure joy.

"No! You are joking? I have never had one of those!" Pulling one form her pocket, Arra smiled and threw it at Gavner's head.

"Call it a foreboding." The only woman vampire smirked, noticing the look of annoyance spread on Crepsley's face.

**TWO HOURS LATER**

"Larten, can we not stop?" Gavner moaned with such child-like innocence, trudging along the old country roads.

"No, we cannot just stop because I have a lot to ponder during our journey. A real vampire would step up, work hard and not trail behind eating M&Ms." Crepsley sniggered, rolling his eyes and sighing when everyone took one from the packet and Gavner pouted dejectedly.

"Hey, get your own M&Ms. I bought these with my own earnings or with some money I found in my pocket but it is still mine." Arra and Vancha both rolled their eyes in unison and shoved the chocolate into their mouths. "Larten, can I have a piggyback?" Gavner asked and did a run and vault onto the vampire's back.

"Why are you being so childish? You act as though you are drunk!" Gavner laughed wickedly along with Arra and Vancha.

"Well… we may have gone out earlier and… what can I say we were taking a break." Gavner slurred and jumped off his back, landing with a thump.

"Oh yeah, that's gonna bruise." Arra teased, helping the rather drunk vampire up.

**ANOTHER TWO HOURS LATER **

"Is that it?" Gavner ,who had now sobered up a little bit, asked with a look of sheer terror on his face.

"I… I did not know that… it was not like that in the brochure!" Mr Crepsley screamed aloud, bats scurrying from the surrounding landscape. "Who is going in first?" Mr Crepsley raised an eyebrow and looked at a still tipsy Gavner.

"Oh yes me, I will just walk through the door which is non existent! It is just a hole Larten that is what they call security nowadays?"

**TBC **

**A/N: **I thought that I would make Gavner a little more comical than he is in the real books so I did. Oh and it's no longer a three shot, it's a four-shot. :D Please review, reviews will keep this one going.


	3. Haunted

**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing in this story. That covers it about.

**A/N:** Please review and read! Oh well other way round but you get the point. :D Thanks xx

**SUMMARY: **So, Larten, Arra, Vancha and Gavner have gone holiday but there's one problem… The cabin is a little different to the one in the brochure. How will things pan out for our favourite vampire and his friends? Three shot.

**SORRY NOTE: **Sorry for the wait but I forgot about this one. Chapter three coming soon I hope.

**TITLE: **Different to the Brochure

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**Part 3- Haunted **

"Larten!" Arra groaned and sat down in a chair. Realisation only hit when she fell through it and landed with a thud… it had no bottom to it. "I thought you would be a little more… classy!"

"Well I… it was not… you see I…" Larten groaned and flopped onto the floor, his cape making a circle around him.

"Larten, if Paris were here, I think you would have just killed him off." Vancha chuckled, wandering around the corridors and looking through broken down doors. "This place isn't exactly 5 star accommodation is it?" Vancha's voice dripped with sarcasm.

"Look, can we make the best of it? Weather you like it or not we are here for a week so maybe we can spruce it up a little." Larten's voice was shy, feeble and a bit disappointed. Soon though, the vampires cast their attention to the corner where a silhouette was becoming visible. "Hello? Who is there?" Mr Crepsley slowly advanced upon the shadowy figure but Arra pulled him back and went herself. Slowly, she walked to the figure and tried to place a hand on it's shoulder. When she span it around, it was a girl about nineteen years old with black hair and a rugged, torn white dress up to her knees. Her skin was deathly white and her face… despite the black rings around her eyes was a thing of beauty. Engraved onto her arm were the words 'I can't go home'.

"Who is your friend?" Gavner asked in a chirpy voice to be hushed by Arra. "Okay then I will ask myself." Gavner walked effortlessly up to her and grinned. "Hello! I am Gavner Purl and these are my friends. So what is your name?" She stared blankly at him, nothing conveyed in her glazed over black eyes.

"I can't go home." She whispered in a croaky voice which sent Gavner backwards.

"Oh my! Isn't she a ray of bloody sunshine?" Mr Crepsley's gaze said everything from 'Shut up!' to 'Gavner, you are a nut box!' "All I was saying is that…" Before he could finish, she shot a hand out and sent him flying backwards. "Oh now that is rude! I am a higher being, an intellectual if you please." Gavner wheezed from the floor.

"Gavner!" Arra said in a disbelieving tone. How could one vampire be such an idiot?" Arra asked and looked over at the girl.

"Who are you?" Arra asked in an anything but kind voice.

"I can't go home." She repeated and pushed Arra to the wall. Mr Crepsley and Vancha sprung into action and tried to advance but she was far too powerful. Gavner ambled over and tipped some rock salt he found in the cupboards over her.

"Ha! Eat my dust! Though that would be lacking hygiene and I am a very clean person, I have showers regularly so I do not think I am dusty." Mr Crepsley rolled his eyes at the thoughtful pose Gavner was striking as though he was on a catwalk.

"I see Darren showed you the joys of the Simpsons." Gavner smiled but his smile faded when she reappeared and shoved him back against the wall. Standing up and brushing himself off, Gavner frowned and pointed an accusatory finger at the ghostly woman.

"Hey! That was not very polite! I demand a refundal of my M 'n' Ms which thanks to you are scattered across the floor! My cape which my mentor made by hand is now dusty and you now have dust to eat but I would rather you not." The woman walked further forwards and pushed a hand out so she was holding him firm in her grasp. Gavner gasped and fell to the floor, taking in sharp breaths. "Ow! That hurt you fool! I am shocked by this, do you have no manners?… shall we leave?" Gavner asked as the woman walked further and further into his personal space.

"Yes, let us vacate this area." Mr Crepsley smiled and they flitted out of the house. "I shall be giving him extra chores when I get back!" Mr Crepsley grumbled, a loud chomping noise inhabiting his ear drums. "What the…" He trailed off when he saw Gavner eating a mars bar. "Gavner!"

"Why is this mention of my name becoming more and more apparent in this relationship?" Mr Crepsley stared blankly, confused tones entangled in his words.

"What relationship?" Mr Crepsley gave up and walked further forwards. It was to be a long journey home… a very long journey.

"The mutual relationship we have grown to love and respect. I wear the pants here Larten, show me some respect!" Gavner mumbled over a mouth full of his chocolate bar.

**A/N: Sorry it's a little short but you finally got some action! Hope you likey and I shall update soonly. **


	4. Returning

**Sorry guys, don't shoot me! I wont lie… I forgot to update but here is the last chapter and look out for my sequel **_**Different to the Internet! **_**Thanks for the reviews! I love you all so, so much! OFF TO OUR VAMPIRE WORLD! **

**Returning… **

"Larten, Larten, Larten? Larten. Larten! Larten. Larten, Larten. Larten. Larten. Larten, Larten. Larten? Lar…" Mr Crepsley span and stopped just before he hit Gavner.

"Yes Gavner!" He drew his words out slowly as though he was stressed.

"Are we nearly there?" Crepsley turned back to face the road and closed his eyes.

"Go in that bush there but make it quick, we do not have all night." Gavner nodded and headed in the direction of the woods they were near. "Oh, I do feel for the tree that he decides to use." He sighed sadly and caught up with the others. Gavner ran after them five minutes later.

"Larten! Larten wait for me." Breaking into a brisk walk as he reached them, he smiled and walked with them. An hour later and the sun was beginning to rise over the trees and cast shadows over the country track they had trekked not a day ago. They soon became shadows ripping through the day to avoid burning but with Gavner that was incredibly hard.

"Hurry up!" Arra screamed at Gavner who traipsed behind them leaving drag marks in the dirt. After several hours of avoiding direct sunlight, they found themselves at the Cirque. Larten and Arra had carried Gavner as he was taking that long they'd be bacon by the time they'd gotten a foot further.

"Darren Shan!" Larten shouted as he entered his and Evra's tent.

"Hey, you're back early." Darren sighed and leant against his hammock.

"We are back early? We are back late! You would not believe what I have had to put up with. We had to stop for three hours because Gavner's feet were aching. We had to stop for an hour because Arra needed some water. We had to stop for two hours because Vancha would not allow her to buy bottled water and I have begun to burn! I look like a jacket potato!" Vancha walked in and sighed.

"Oh it's not that bad." He was bright red and matched the cape he wore. "I think I need a beverage and a sit down." Mr Crepsley sighed and pulled his head over his slightly burnt head.

"I am going to sleep! If I hear one more word from you I will murder you myself. Goodnight Darren, Evra, Evra's snake." Mr Crepsley mumbled and headed back into the day.

"Okay so that could have gone better." Darren muttered under his breath, a sad expression sliding onto his face.

"Yeah… but on the plus side, I'm gonna change my Facebook status to _Living with a potato." _

"You have Facebook?" Evra wordlessly nodded and sighed. "Hey look, lonely hearts ad. Should we sign up Crepsley? Make it up to him!" Darren nodded and slid over to the computer where Evra was perched.

**To Be Continued….. **

**Keep checking for my sequel and that is that. The end of a comical Gavner! OH NO! WHAT A NIGHTMARE! I may go and cry… or I may go and write the Gavner series! :O Views? LIGHT BULB! **


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